Co-Sleeping

Parents: did you co-sleep? Did it work for you?

We have been co-sleeping since day 1. It was the only way we could get a halfway decent sleep. But now parang di na sustainable for me. My back is killing me! :bawling: LO wakes up every 2 or 3 hours to nurse (sleep prop, bad I know) and I fall back asleep (or pass out more like) with my spine curved in an unnatural and tense way kasi nga pinapadede ko sya while nakahiga. kaya minsan gumigising ako na parang di ako makabangon sa kama.

If you co-slept, how did you transition to his own bed? own room?

Salamat sa tips! or commiseration kung walang tip :hahaha:

4 Likes

My son was born while I was finishing my grad studies. My wife would stay with him in the morning and she made me sleep next to him at night so we could at least bond. We were glad/lucky he only made us wake up every few hours during the night to nurse for a little over a month. For that first month he would fall asleep at 8 or 9PM and then wake up at 1-2AM. After that he would wake up at 4AM, since I wake up at 5 anyway, that was good already.

Anyway he still slept with us till about 4 years old, at which point we were already pretty cramped in bed. He now sleeps in his own bed (he’s now 6) but still in our room. Though we are slowly giving him hints and incentive to sleep in his own “play” room (he takes afternoon naps there, but stays with us at night).

2 Likes

Still co-sleeping, my son is 4yo.

He was used to sleeping in his own crib near my side of the bed until I went back to work and I feel like I need to spend more time with him, kahit sa pagtulog lang :biggrin:. Pero siempre at that time, ang rason ko ay para hindi na ko babangon to feed him (though more than once ako naalimpungatan na yung pinapadede ko ay nasa binti/paanan ko na :embarasslaff:) Asar talo pa din ako sa asawa ko until now.

Now, he (afternoon) naps in his room. Pero sa gabi, ayaw talaga. Kaso lang ang laki na kasi so minsan biglang may matabang binti na dadagan sa leeg ko akala ko may sumasakal na sakin :rotfl:

4 Likes

@abbymaria You already know all too well ang aking ongoing journey and sleep challenges so just throwing in my commiserations again :embarasslaff:
Replying to this thread so that I can remember to watch replies, hahaha

1 Like

Lucky! You have a magic baby. I was a zombie wreck the first four months! He woke up frequently and even though we started out with the best intentions – bassinet, tapos crib–he only slept in his bassinet the first half of the night because I got tired of getting up every hour to calm him down when he wakes up.

ayayay! Paano ang love life ni mommy and daddy! :laugh:

:heart: true. Kahit makabali likod mag co-sleep while nursing, sobrang nakakasaya naman talaga ang mag cuddle with a baby and wake up with a snoring baby snuggled close to you!

LOL! I can totally relate. Around his 6th month, we submitted ourselves to co-sleeping for the next few months so we replaced our bed with a frame less bed-in-a-box na nilatag lang sa floor. Kasi I was always petrified of him rolling over in his sleep. Which he did, when he got a little older and nag ru roll over na sya haha. Buti nalang carpeted! :smash:

Ikwento mo pa din!

2 Likes

Proud co-sleep parent/s here! Iba ang pakiramdam na nayayakap mo sila sa pagtulog. Especially when you remember that in a few years, ayaw na nila magpa-kiss sa’yo, much less tabihan ka sa pagtulog.

3 Likes

First 20 months nag co sleep siya. Then my wife had enough. She had to wean him off as well.

She went overseas for two weeks to have a vacation (good for her). Aftermath? Kaming 2 na ng anak ko nag co sleep until now and he’s 45 months old na. And he still doesn’t want to sleep in his own room. Gusto pa rin niya daw ako katabi matulog.

Kaya nga raw di nakikidnap yung mga Asian kids sa mga western TV shows kasi they cosleep with parents. Di naiiwan sa room mag-isa.

2 Likes

thank you for this tip!!! bwahahahaha! but I can’t imagine being away for weeks! how did ate T take it??

Yan nga napag-usapan namin ni @whatsy din. Automatic kasi sa atin mga Pinoys na katabi matulog ng parents ang baby diba? Tas yung papadede at karga on demand habang baby pa. Dito rigid feeding and nap schedules. Sabagay its for the benefit of busy parents din.

1 Like

I think working, having to pump breastmilk, and breastfeeding took a toll. Si Baby L pa naman ayaw magtake ng bottle kaya exhausting talaga. One would really reach some sort of breaking point and I think it was a relief for her din because she had her “me” time.

So as far as sleep training goes, sabi ng anak ko pag nag school na raw siya, matutulog na raw siya sa room niya (I’ll believe it when I see it). I always tell him sa daycare he’s able to sleep by himself pero nambobola na rin siya na he loves sleeping with dad.

2 Likes

Good for you, you gave her that chance to recharge!

Same with A, he does not take the bottle din just dede. He drinks whole milk now from his transition sippy cup but its more like to wash down solid meals. He still prefers good ol dede para pampatulog. My plan is to wean him off by august na talaga. He will be 17 months by then. Cue Ali Wong: I think i’ve suffered enough! :rotflmao:

2 Likes

I’m not the one to give advice about weaning from co-sleeping because we co-slept until my boys were 5 and 7 years old. :lol: Just this January lang sila nagsleep in their own room. Pero I don’t regret it one bit. I’ve been a stay-at-home mom since we came to the U.S. in 2015. But I’m sure some working moms really do need a “break” from the kids, kahit sa gabi lang. The best person to ask about tips for making your child sleep in his own bed and room is an American. Ganun sila dito, infant pa nga lang separate room na agad. May baby monitor lang sila to check on them at night or when they’re in another room. Madaming American way of raising kids ang hindi ko ma-adopt. To each his own talaga.

Anyway, pano ko ba ginawa yung transition? Ang reasoning ko sa kanila, it’s time to move to their own room kasi malaki na sila! haha. Pero nung first week, yung younger one pumupunta sa room namin in the middle of the night. Pero buti na lang he got used to being in their room na rin eventually.

2 Likes

:shock: OMG! I see my sleeptime future :bawling:
Pero sana hindi naman. I am itching to get back to the times na pwede na ako mag sleep in ulit, and dire diretsong tulog kahit 6-7 hours lang.

True, for me yung cry-it-out method of sleep training. Hindi ko kaya and I’ve read enough literature to turn me off it completely.

2 Likes

@abbymaria, it really depends on your child. I’m really lucky my boys slept through the night ever since they were little. Yung panganay ko, he didn’t nurse directly kasi he preferred the bottle nipple kaya until 6 months lang ako nagpump. Less puyat ako sa kanya. When I stopped direct breastfeeding my bunso (he was 1 year old that time), medyo hindi na ako masyadong puyat sa gabi. He did drink milk from the bottle (while sleeping) until he was 3 years old . So nagigising din ako nun to give his milk pero naisip ko na lang magdala ng cooler sa room para I can just grab a bottle of milk during the night. Kaya talagang big relief when he stopped asking for milk at night. Nakabalik na ako sa 6-8 hours of sleep. I’m sure you will find your own routine, and figure out a way that works for the both of you, because you need your rest too. Good luck!

2 Likes

Same here.

1 Like

I dont remember co-sleeping with the kiddo when she was a baby mainly because night shift ako after my maternity leave. Kaya hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit ayaw pa niya humiwalay ng kwarto eh 11yo na. :headscratch:

1 Like

I dont know if co-sleeping pa yung case ko but I am 31years old, and believe it or not, we still sleep in the same room (different bed of course). Others would find this hilarious and odd but I love all the years I can ‘bond’ with my parents especially now they are in their senior years :wink:

Even in the province, where we have a bigger house - we still sleep together (they are in the bed, I pull my mattress on the floor)

4 Likes

Yung friend ko from work who is also Pinoy, his son co-slept with them until his son was 9. What happened that made him sleep in his own? Well yung friends nung bata came to their house for a sleepover and the friends noticed that the son’s bed looked like it has never been slept in. I guess he got teased for it. After that daw, natulog na sa kwarto yung anak niya. I guess “peer pressure” worked.

My cousins do the same thing when I visit my uncle and aunt. They would give us their room and then they would just pull out mattresses and sleep in their parents’ room. They wouldn’t go sleep on the couch.

My son has a good set of lungs and I can probably bear the crying but my wife would hurry just to check on him (mom’s are differently wired daw). Now I just try to reinforce the idea that once he’s going to school he has to go to his room to sleep.

this is a scientific fact, I know cause I looked it up because I want some science to back me up when B starts being so superior that he can stand daw the screaming better than I can, he doesn’t get why I can’t just leave the baby alone. Linyahan niya pa: he’s fed, he’s changed, he’s warm and safe let him cry. I’m like, he is 6 months old, his only way to communicate is through crying. Clearly something is not right in his world, and his cognitive development is not at a level where he knows how to “manipulate” people around him. Parang ang brutal niyong mga ama! :laugh:

Eto pala yun, naghanap pa ako ng legit na source otherwise kung mommy blogs/forum sites lang idi-dismiss lang niya :smash:

It’s an evolutionary mechanism, daddies! Don’t mock the moms for responding the way nature designed them to!

1 Like

OffT: but that crying out method worked for us with car seats. Di ba dito naman sa Pinas hindi yan masyado practiced. But I really want my son to get used to it dahil hindi ako maglolong drive na karga/kandong ko sya. Mabigat. Hindi kami makakalayo ng Manila. Anyway, so the first time was hell. He was crying like crazy and i was seated beside him and my husband was checking on ME through the rearview mirror. Ako ang binabantayan nya. Lol! It was heart wrenching but one of the best decisions ever. Since that day when he was 2months old, sitting pretty na ako sa long drives :grin:

So that’s different, and for me, it’s not actually a training method for anything–it’s more of walang choice situation.

he is pretty good with being in car rides kasi his dad takes him to and from day care 5 days a week. It’s the longer rides that become a problem.

We often drive 4 to 5 hours to visit his grandparents and wala lang talagang choice kundi pabayaan siya umiyak because we can’t stop every time he cries. So yan, wala ako magagawa basta alam ko he isn’t in any way uncomfortable/hungry/thirsty/hot/cold/wet. I just sit there until he falls asleep or stops crying on his own.

Oh actually, edit to add: nung bisitahin kami ng sister ko (childless) dito, she was the one who couldn’t stand it and felt so bad, tried to console the baby (futile exercise). But there is literally nothing we can do short of me taking him out and putting him on my lap (illegal). We are on the freeway and it’s dangerous to stop on the shoulder anytime. Have to wait until we get to a rest area.