True! And bold italicised and underlined ang “without drama”. Our history & culture has made us a little more melodramatic than our overseas neighbours. They do not necessarily respond to drama, if even, the way we expect them to. Solution: drama-free na, and it works universally, relasyones man o hindi.
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Naparinggan na ba kayo ng something along the lines of…
“May kababayan na naman tayong nakaahon sa kahirapan!”
?
Dati, sobrang naiinsulto ako. I’d retort haughtily (e.g., “Hindi lang kasi kayo nakakatikim ng malaki…at masarap na…schublig”) #charaughtnotcharaught. I know, I know. Maldita. But as I grew in self-awareness and compassion, pag may ganyang ganap, I take it as a moment to engage. To have a discussion on power dynamics of genders and “race” (I find race an artificial concept, but a convenient handle still - story for another day), and its implications on relationships.
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ikaw ba yung kaklase ko? familiar nick mo eh.
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@LaEmanciputa yes girl! Sinasabi ko talagang, “Di ako patay-gutom sa Pilipinas noh!” 
Juice ko I sacrificed my career just to be with my husband. I used to earn more sa Pilipinas kumpara dito. I started from scratch career-wise because I had to first learn the language. 
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Hindi naman naparinggan ng ganyan but i remember i had a pamangkin (he was probably 5 or 6 yo at that time) na manghang mangha na puti ang [ex]bf ko. Sabi ba naman, “siya po ang bf niyo? Ang swerte niyo naman tita!”
Na sinagot ko naman agad na, “Ay hindi. Siya ang swerte sa akin dahil siya ang napili ko!” Tapos hinila na ng pinsan ko yung anak nya ahahaha
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@insane_pauper, Maraaaaming times when dining, sa partner ko iaabot yung bill. I love the look on the server’s face when I get the bill jacket and put my card in it.
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from both sides. Yung from Pinoy (men usually) na mga parinig about bakit hindi Pinoy pinili ko. Tapos from his side may nagtatanong din bakit di somebody African or from his tribe (very tribalistic pa dito. ) Some African women treat me differently na parang ninakaw ko isa sa kanila. Ganun.
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With my last narcissist churva, it’s super sweet when people around us realise that I (the non-white) provide for him (the white local), that this is my place and he is just staying here for free, that even if he talks a big game, i make things happen for him, that when i became a citizen i paid for that bouquet of flowers that he oddly asked to carry; but no, it wasn’t his gift to me, that i paid for his health cover deficiencies on the spot so he could be admitted to rehab etc etc.
But a bit pissed off that these wrong impressions, misconceptions were there in the first place. Why dint they talk to me? I have waaaay better grammar, spelling, and 99% less bullshit. Why did they assume immediately I am the “lesser”? I don’t care honestly, but be fair diba? If i would be made to look as such, and treated as so, ay am sorry I’ll put you right where you should be. 
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@LaEmanciputa you go girl! 
Deadma rin ako sa iba. Ako din nagbayad nung first date namin. Lakas lang maka-independent woman. 
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I call that discuss diplomatically. It is definitely universal.
Oh boy! YAAASSSSS!!!
Tipong may relatives na bakit hindi ka nagpapadala sa family mo? Like, number one, they don’t ask/require me to and number two, my family is financially independent of me or my husband.
Or another relative na: Bakit nandyan pa kayo in X country at hindi kayo sa mas ok dun eh. Obviously, hindi ok sa country ni hubby kaya nandito kami.
Hindi ko na masyado pinapansin or just say na fam is fine, thanks for asking.
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Magkasabay ba tayong grumaduate? At bineso mo a
ba ako sa college graduation? Kung oo sa dalawang tanong, malamang magkaklase nga tayo. 
On-topic: I fully agree with @quarantine that for some (like for us 
) personality and upbringing would matter more than the race factor.
Lesson: madaming mga pakialemerang palaka out there. E di stare them down. If mas matangkad sila sayo, e di glare at them. 
Corny. 
but really, why should their opinion matter?
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puro short time lang sa akin 
Taga-holy land si missis…
Kaya ayan, mabait na ako.
Inambush ako after yung seminar namin,
Nagustuhan nya daw yung da-moves ko sa seminar
At mag train daw sya sa akin…
Fast forward 13 years… mabait pa din ako
@quarantined
Similar yan sa sitwasyon ng wife ko…
To make it more complicated, bakit daw pinoy…
kase dito, mababa tingin nila sa pilipino. Usually din
Kase dito, yung lalake ang may pinay na wife.
Di ko kasalanan na gusto ni missis ang adobo.
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I will share my past experience with a German guy. He is on his late 40s and me on my mid-30s. It started when I flew to Berlin to attend Berlin Pride, he saw my profile and started messaging me even if I was flying back to Asia already. The communication was very frequent.
It took another 10 months in the waiting for me to go back to Europe for work. And there I got the chance to take a personal time off and board a ticket to Berlin to meet him personally for the first time. Before that I already took language classes, even finishing my A1 just in case I decide on the spot to leave Asia and move with him.
When we met, it led to fantastic sexual experiences we both enjoyed. But then, I knew when I met in person that it will not lead to what I initially hoped for. At least he had me as a souvenir. I’m glad I listened.
I learned some of life’s painful lessons from that encounter. And the experience taught me to never trade my non-negotiables in life.
Looking forward to hearing more from others in this room.
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